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Author Topic: husband-wife funnies for a dull day........................  (Read 3508 times)
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« on: February 07, 2018, 02 :09:08 AM »

A wife asked her husband: “What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?”
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: “I like your sense of humor!”

Wife: “What are you doing?”
Husband: Nothing.
Wife: “Nothing? You’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.
Husband: “I was looking for the expiration date.”

Two husbands were having a conversation, First guy (proudly): “My wife’s an angel!”
Second guy: “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.”

A man says to his friend, “I haven’t spoken to my wife in 18 months.”
The friend says, “Why not?”
The man says, “I don’t like to interrupt her.”

A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?”
And the father replied, “I don’t know, son, I’m still paying for it.”

Doctor: Madam, your husband needs rest and peace so here are some sleeping pills.
Wife: Doc, when should I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you!

Wife: ‘Darling, look. I haven’t worn this in 8 years and it still fits.’
Husband: For God’s sake.
It’s a scarf!

Boss hangs a poster in Office
He returns from lunch, finds a slip on his desk.
“Ur wife called, she wants her poster back home.”

Wife: Our new neighbor always kisses his wife when he goes to work, why don’t you do that?
Husband: How can I? I don’t even know her.

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

Lord, make me fast and accurate. Let my aim be true and my hand faster than those who seek to destroy me. Grant me victory over my foes and those that wish to do harm to me and mine. Let not my last thought be, if only I had a gun, and lord, if today is the day you call me home, let me die in a pile of empty brass
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« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2018, 05 :43:28 AM »

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